Parenting Training Guide
Overview
Children are arrows. An arrow is useful when:
- Sharpened
- Wielded by a master marksman
- Aimed at a specific problem
Children are sharpened by:
- Protecting them
- Developing Mind
- Developing Character
- Shaping their Will
Society is reformed through children, not adults
- God reforms the whole world through Abraham's seed
- God gives Isaac a special kind of civilization
- Polygamy to Monogamy
- Polytheism to Monotheism
- Marriage ideals
- Dressing
- How men and women treat each other
- From taking no prisoners to Mercy
- Why did God make Abraham wait for so long before having Isaac?
- What specific target are you raising your children for?
The child is the prize of the marriage
- You can judge the quality and usefulness of the marriage by the quality of the child in the marriage
- If you lose the child, you have lost the marriage
- Marriage is more than companionship, it is to raising new spirits in the image of God
You have to win the love of the child
The child is not yours by birth, you have to win them over to yourself, with love
God contends for the love of his children, and so should you
Deuteronomy 6:5
You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
Love must be reciprocated
Why did God make Abraham attempt to sacrifice his son Isaac, and then later tell him to stop when he sees that Abraham is willing to do it?
How do you win the child over to yourself with love?
The child must minister love to their parents
They do not have money, but they can share their prayers
When the child does not love you in return, can you raise and establish them?
The child must reach a point in their lives where they consider the effects of their actions on their parents, before carrying them out
They must do things for their parents, not because they like it, but because it will please their parents
Did Christ obey the Father in all things because he enjoyed it?
Matthew 26:39
He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”
You have to win the respect of your child
- You may play with your child, but you and your child are not playmates
- It matters how you dress
- It matters how you speak
- It matters how you behave around them
- It matters how other people interact with you, eg. husband, strangers, etc
- A little bent tree can only be straightened by a straight stick
- Some children will struggle to tell you all their parents have said in a day because they completely disregard what they say
You have to win the trust of the child
- The child cannot call you a liar, even playfully
- The child must have absolute trust and respect for their parents.
- Rebuke the child the moment they do this.
You cannot parent the child from a distance
- The parent of the child is the one with the child.
- The parent observes the child and takes steps to align them.
- Unlikely parents of the child: Peers, Strangers, Influencers
Parenting is communal
- You cannot parent the child alone
- Example of the child who was meeting up with a rasta man to have her virginity broken, and I was the only one there to stop it
- Sometimes we can assign new parents to children who are not being actively parented
- Example of the girl who sits by the roadside with her legs spread apart and her panties showing for everyone to see
Parenting is a choice
- You can choose to parent other people's children
- You can choose to parent your children
- The person who treats the child like their own child is the parent of the child
- Sometimes the parent of the child is an unlikely fellow